Please quit sending me bogus "notifications" trying to get me to log in to my account. I don't give a shit or you wouldn't be sending me these "notifications" about things I "might have missed" last time I was on. I "missed" them for a reason. I don't care when someone says "Had Taco Bell for lunch, taking a nap now." So kindly understand that I just don't give a flying fuck and quit spamming my inbox. I only have an account so people don't gasp in horror whenever I tell them I don't have a Facebook page and justify my reasoning for the next 20 minutes.
P.S. If you say I have to log in to disable the notifications I. Will. Cut. You. At no point did I have to enable these notifications, so eff-to-the-u.
P. P. S. Don't take it personally. Have a lovely song to make you feel better.